Wednesday, October 30, 2013

The day we were no longer virgins...she said VS. He said

This is going to come as a surprise to some of you, but I am not a virgin. I know right? I just blew your minds.I thought it would be interesting to do a little experiment. I've always had a weird obsession about hearing peoples stories of how they lost their virginity. It's always hilarious even when it's not meant to be, luckily for me, I'm still friends with the guy who got the honour of taking my V-card. So I am forcing him to write a dual blog post here about our experience of taking the plunge into sexual beings. I asked him to write down how he remembers it, and without reading his, I am writing down how I remember it, and let's see if the experiences turn out the same and if we remember all the same details. Here is my story of the day he plucked my flower from my garden, Justin and I were always boyfriend and girlfriend throughout public school, I want to say it started in grade 3, possibly before then but I'm going to say grade 3. He was the class clown and I was pretty much how I am now but weirder looking, terrible glasses, terrrrrible hair and I wore a lot of fleece zip up vests. Justin was just the cutest, usually had a mushroom cut, wore a lot of yellow, and was the kid no parent wanted in their group when we went on field trips. Clearly my bad boy obsession started at a very young age. Over the years Justin did really cute things to win me over, such as giving me a plastic ring in the shape of a spider to declare his love for me. He left a single red rose on my seat at the IMAX theatre when we went there for a field trip, the rose was accompanied by a note asking if I'd be his girlfriend again...likely for the 50th time that year, we broke up a lot. It was clear at that moment, this boy had my heart,and in a few years, he'd be the first guy to climb Mount Lula (lula is my nickname for my vagina). Over the years Justin was my first everything, first kiss (in a closet during school), first dry hump, etc. But to be fair, I know Justin was a lot of girls first kiss, he was a pimp in public school, no doubt about that. Justin moved on from cute love notes, to perverted notes slipped to me during grade 8 math class that said things like, 'just touch it....' I eventually did touch it, I touched it in math class, and eventually the entire class including my teacher found out I gave Justin a handjob(and by handjob I do mean I think I just touch his peepee) in math class which is when the nickname 'jerky jerky' was coined. That is also when I learned how to laugh things off and roll with the punches. We finished public school and were entering high school. We still hung out and usually met at the local hockey arena near by. At this point we both knew what sex was and I knew, well at the time thought we were ready to mash our private parts together. I believe it was either the march break going into high school, or the march break during our first year of high school, but I know for a fact it was march break. We met up at the arena, hanging out on the top floor, which was always empty. Justin spent days trying to convince me to have sex in the hallways of this cold arena. I wanted our first time to be special, so we made plans to meet up at his house because his mom would be at work during the day. I remember putting on my best fleece vest, and black ModRobe pants. I walked over to his house and rang the door bell, Justin opened the door with this big, goofy grin, and way too much gel in his hair, but he was still the cute, goofy boy I swooned over in grade school. How I remember it, we kissed, and then he said...'so, you like stuff?' And he grabbed my hand and led me up stairs. I don't think there was any foreplay. I don't really think teenagers take their time prior to penetration. I do remember him struggling with putting the condom on. When he did get it on, it was go time. To be very honest, I think the first minute he spent humping my thigh. But eventually he got the rabbit in the rabbit hole and we were no longer virgins. I can't even really recall the specifics of his penis, not that it's not memorable but more because there has been a penis or two in my life since his, and I don't think I could identify what his penis looks like in a penis line up. I recall Justin asking if I was doing okay, so that was nice to know he cared about my well being. But really Justin, neither of us knew what we were doing and you didn't really beat the pussy up that time. We finished, well...he finished. I don't think I knew that a female should finish too at that young age. But the sex ended.i think the whole ordeal from start to finish lasted as long as a commercial break on T.V. He laid there in bed with the biggest smile I have ever seen in my entire life, and I lay there worrying about everything that happens now that I am no longer a virgin. We got dressed and headed over to our friends house. I made him promise to not tell our friends, but when we got there and our group of friends were hanging out in the basement watching movies and we walk in, Justin with a grin the size of a School bus and myself being wayyy to quiet and flushed in the face, gave it away that we had done the hanky panky. I'm very happy I shared that special moment with Justin, we were longtime friends, and still are! He is now the father of two boys, and has an amazing fiancé, he is a local rapper, which always made me laugh because I lost my virginty to a white guy, but he turned out to have more street cred than any black guy I've had sex with. Okay, so now on to his side of the story, .................................................................. "sooo me and a buddy were looking at the fact that we were highschool virgins. to be honest I dont even think we were actually in highschool yet but it was comming up fast and we were like yooo...apple pie. We knew if we were gonna be cool we had to get laid. TV taught me that. So how we got these girls to come over is a little hazy. I think it was foggy that day. regardless, when they came over I remember hanging out in the living room for a little bit, then bringing Leanne upstairs leaving our friends in that room. I burned a cd of music that i liked at the time and was like this is the cd im going to be listening to when i dive into the messy flesh flower for the first time ever for! i was pretty hyped about it. I dont know if I was smoking pot at that time yet but if it was in my life chances are I was high for it. so we went into my bedroom, then i think some more fog drifted in or something and i ended up the bathroom. I think she told me to fuck off for a minute or something. maybe i was doing it wrong? or she needed to prepare or something. I don't know how it works for girls. either way, i looked down at my dick and smiled at it. I was like yaaaaa. but the minute i touched it I ejaculated everywhere. i was like wut the fuck! it wasn't even really hard yet i didn't understand. I looked back at it and was like you muther fucker you better not fuck this up for me. so I cleaned up and was like ok..time to face the music i so cleverly selected. i came out and she was under the blanket. i wanted to rip the blanket off and fondle her vagina akwardly until I learned how it worked. like the time me and greg dobbs smashed his brothers radio so we could look inside and see whats going on. but i was like...shes probably not going to go for that so i dropped my pants and jump in under the covers. my dick didn't really get too hard cause i just spermed all over my bathroom but i was like i dont give a fuck! im going to fuck right now! i might have made out with it first i dont remember. but i do remember the first time i placed my manhood into the warm sweet embarce of vagina. my dick got hard and it lasted a minute if i'm lucky. in my head i was like ok, im gonna have to work on this but at least i set my foundation for being cool when i get to highschool. im not gonna feel like carlton on the fresh prince of bel air in the episode where the guys are in the beach house talking about sex and carlton gets embarrassed cause hes a virgin so he ends up sleeping with the wife of some dean to a prestigous college he was hoping to attend. only he didnt know she was married so he gets sad. its a good episode. anyways im SirReal the real deal Holyfield and I took away Leanne's virginity.".................................and there you have it! The same story...told in two different ways! What I learned about losing my virginity, it wasn't show stopping, the world moved on, there was no article in the London Free Press the next day. We both grew up to be two odd adults, me a wanna be comedian and him a white rapper, it's not a sappy love story, but it's our story., and a big shout out to Justin for writing his story for me, even though he didn't want to, but that just reminds me of how powerful pussy really is, it can still make a guy do anything you want him to do, even if he hasn't seen your vagina for over a decade!

No comments:

Post a Comment